Monday, June 28, 2010

Catch Me If You Can..

I was ready to say goodbye...

I was ready to throw away the almost two months of memories.

But then, he isn't. he couldn't, he wouldn't.

With his hope that I still love him, he went running back. Thinking he could not move on, his love prevailed and promised that he will do everything to make it it alright. For the past three weeks, he's been proving that its worth it. That we are worth it. That we are infinite.

That someday, the trials that were experiencing now will be something to laugh about in the future. That the songs that were singing now will give meaning to our happy ending. And maybe, if fate permits us, our favorite word from now on is SOON.

Met his Dad last Saturday. He said, "Eto ba yung mamanugangin ko? Akala ko photogenic ka lang, mas maganda ka pala sa personal. Lagi ka ngang binibida ni Jeff eh, ikaw na talaga yung gusto niya." He brought me to their Church. And I felt good that he's so proud of taking me there. He met my parents yesterday, and although it will be a huge fight, I know that its worth it in the end. It will be because the signs are pointing out that we should be together.

We also met Mela last Thursday, and she was so happy that I finally found someone who she thinks is best for me. That she said it will be something worth it in the end. She thinks that were soulmates. And by far, I think he really is.

Because of the trials that we experienced, it actually made me stronger. I never thought that things can change in a snap of a finger, but I'm actually psyched it made me a better person. And I'm even more thankful that I have friends who were there to support me and love me. If not for them, I will still be broken.

And to my soul sister Mench, thank you for all the things that you have done for Jeff and I. You believed in us when I'm ready to give up, and you never failed to be my shoulder to cry on.

...On to the next chapter of my life. It will be like a roller-coaster all right, but this is one nerve-wrecking, but the best-est ride of all.

Definitely, Maybe. <3<3<3

Thursday, June 10, 2010

We Had to Say Goodbye

The sweetest memories has the most painful thorns. We should've, could've, would've, but you chose to play this game. You taught me a lot of things I never thought possible. You made me your princess, only to get it back afterwards. I may have loved you, and I know I'd always will, but this is far too complicated for us. I know its unnecessary to have ideals. The perfect guy does not exist. The perfect man isnt possible. Because there isnt. But I needed someone real. I needed someone I could trust. Someone who looks straight in my eyes and tells me the truth. Someone who is not afraid to share his past. Someone who is not coward to start a relationship based on truth.

In the future, I will find someone like you. Someone caring, someone loving, but real. He may not amount to the the love you have shown me for the past month, but I know that when he tells me everything, he is not faking every single detail about his life. That I will have the courage to believe him because I love him so much.

Thanks for the memories...I will never ever forget them. I promised you before that I will never forget you too. I love you. I still do, but I had to let go because I can't bear hurting other people. I can't see myself sharing a love that is meant only for me and for my future family. My parents never deprived me of anything. And I have to be grateful for the things that they sacrificed for me. And I know that they only want the best for me. If not perfect, at least someone I could only get for myself. I have a long way ahead of me. I am young, I will meet a lot of people. I will have friends who will stand up for me, but most especially, I will have that someone who is right for me.

If we only lived in the same time, in the same instance, I know we'd be together. But its impossible now to turn the hands of time. That cannot be dealt. Maybe in a different lifetime. But not now. Not this moment. I'm just here to be your friend, but the pain will always be there.

It pains to see that even in the few days that weve built our future together, they could not be possible. They are like dead stars. Fading in a blackhole.

I love you, and you know I'd always will. You're still going to be that most important person in my life who changed me when everyone doesnt want to believe I can. And I'll always be thankful for that.

But for now, I guess a goodbye is just proper to thank you for the memories that we had. What we had was real. What we had was one of the best moments in my life. I'd always love you By, and maybe, just maybe in the next lifetime, we could continue our story again...

Tuesday, June 01, 2010

Wedding Month!

I've always loved June, because its the time for weddings! :)

Last Saturday, we've attended the most exciting wedding we've all been waiting for, Sir Melan and Red's Black and White wedding! It might sound absurd to the traditional, especially Sir Melan's Mom who said "Ang dami-daming kulay sa mundo, bakit itim pa pinili mo!", but it definitely is one great wedding. Might just be one of the best I've ever been.

Miss Cherry and I were a bit hands-on during the ceremony and at the venue. She said that this is a great practice for my future. Nah, as if I'd get married this early. Not at least when were just building our relationship. :P But I was so touched when Miss Che told me, "pag ikaw ria from ur hairpin down to ur garter ako lahat PLAN !!!!!!!! pero gusto ko si MJ!!!! so be good kay MJ"

I never thought that boyfriend would have that impact to my friends. Now I wonder if it is my time to get hitched, I'm very much sure that they will all support me. It is so overwhelming because they all have wonderful words for him. Maybe I did good this time. :)

Back to Sir Melan and Red's wedding, I'm just so happy for the newlyweds. Not that I witnessed how their love story unfold, but because I know how much they value each other. Sir Melan even said that weddings are sacred for him and he wants to get married with the right person. And here's my cue to a neverending "awwwww" :P

Here's to your forever and ever newlyweds! I'm ecstatic for the both of you. Keep the love alive always! :)


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