Wednesday, March 28, 2007

She has been my stronghold, my wind beneath my wings, my hero..

2 years ago at this very day, I woke up one morning and found out that one of the most important and influential person in my life passed away. As my brother nudged me from my usual slumber, he was sort of crying to tell me that she is indeed taken already.
Part of me couldn't believe because I sensed that she could still make it. That she is this one strong person to overcome everything. As she becomes weaker everyday, I too, could feel her pain. I too, could feel that she was getting ready to let go.

As I made my way to her house, I still could feel her warmth, her love and the lessons that she forever embraced me. I imagined her singing me lullabies and giving me coins even though my mom forbid her too, because I might buy toys or candies. But she didn't listen to her. She continued being supportive of me. Even though she couldn't come to our school plays, she makes sure that I bring everything on my way to school. My bus driver would even tease her that the "balikbayan" is going to ride at the school service again because my humongous bag of school stuffs and lunch box.

At the beginning of my summer in First Year College, we all learned that she was sick. Worse, she was sick with cancer. The C-word was even painful not at the ears but was struck to our hearts. She stayed for a while at the hospital while we take shifts in attending to her.

She was given 8 months to live. But she surpassed the 8-month deadline to TWO YEARS.

That's how strong she was.

Then one Monday morning, everything fell apart. My cousins were sleeping beside her. She even asked for breakfast at maybe five am. At 8 am, she was found lifeless, calmly sleeping but wouldn't wake up anymore.

Still, I regret that I haven't been able to take care of her as she did to all of us. I regret that she was the root of us all. If it weren't for her, the house would feel empty because she never failed to show us love, and most of all, how unconditional her care for us.

She, until now, lives in our hearts. She may be gone for two years but the lessons and her passions in life still remains to exist.

"Later that year, at the turn of spring, Heaven sent angels down and gave Grandma her wings. Now, she's flying, and sliding, and gliding In better days"

We will always miss you Nanay. And we love you so much.

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